Mental illness has an impact on all spheres of a person’s life and those of those around him. You, the readers, family, and friends of people with Alzheimer’s disease, are well placed to know this. We all, mentally ill or not, have needs, wants, and aspirations. We can all be in love, desire tenderness, warmth, and affection. We all want to have access to a better quality of life. And the need for intimacy, Sexuality, even if we don’t talk much about it when it comes to mental illness, is part of that whole.
In the 21st century, with research, studies, and developments in psychiatry, it can be said that we know more and more about mental illness, although, of course, there is still room for improvement.
We better understand the impacts of different diseases, we develop more effective treatments to control symptoms. Nowadays, interventions and medication aim to enable people with the disease to return to normal life and enable people with the disease to have more active and enjoyable lives.
Social services, hospital workers, and other centers have a more global vision of the affected person who is also a man or a woman, a husband, a mother, and no more than a sick person …
How do sufferers experience their intimacy?
Are they entitled to it, or do they want it? This can arouse a certain amount of curiosity. We can be shocked at the very idea of thinking about this aspect of the person’s life with the disease that we are accompanying in the disease. However, the various diseases have a real impact on sexual desire and actions. Indeed, depressed people report experiencing a loss of interest in sexual activities. People with schizophrenia can experience social withdrawal, which impacts contact and relationships with others, and therefore on sexual and intimate relationships.
In psychosis, sexual or romantic delusions, obsessions, or even a loss of interest in Sexuality can occur. People with a borderline personality disorder, on the other hand, tend to have impulsive sexual acts or try to fill a great inner void through sexual acts. They also potentially put themselves in danger during these impulsive and repeated sexual activities, sometimes neglecting protection and safety to the detriment of the urgency of acting. And it seems that people with anxiety, more than the general population, experience a decrease in sexual interest and desire. All of this affects the quality of life of the affected person and also of the unaffected spouse in the couple.
Medication has an impact on sex life
You should also know that medication, as much as mental disorders, impacts sex life. Moreover, it would seem that “sexual dysfunctions constitute the most disturbing side effect for patients, but few of them will spontaneously report it to their doctor. We know that some people stop taking treatment for this reason. Therefore, it is necessary as a spouse, as a practitioner, as an accompanist, or as a parent not to relegate the question of Sexuality to the background. Especially since this type’s discomfort, which would cause the medication to be stopped, could also trigger a relapse or the reappearance of disturbing symptoms.
What is the space reserved for Sexuality when you are hospitalized?
It is not a question here of pretending that everything is still normal or allowing inappropriate sexual activities to be carried out or experienced as mental illness symptoms (e.g., sexual delirium). It is also not a question of excusing unacceptable behavior, violent or disrespectful, on the pretext that a person is reached or does not have enough social skills due to his disease. But, in this month of International AIDS Day, it can be interesting to approach the issue of Sexuality and intimacy from another angle, to talk about normal and Healthy Sexuality. The one from which we all come, the one who is part of us as a human being, as a social being, as a sensitive being. The question then arises: how do you live your Sexuality when you are a child who has become an adult who lives with his parents? What is the space reserved for Sexuality when you are hospitalized for several months? What place does privacy have in a center or a home for people with the disease?
How to approach these delicate questions?
As a spouse, you must remember to approach this delicate question gently and without judgment. Knowing how to live with certain adjustments or changes without denying the existence of Sexuality or making it a thing of the past, a thing of the past. As the spouse of a person with dementia, it can be invaluable to open a dialogue on this subject. To reduce discomfort, find a rhythm that suits both people involved and not dismiss out of hand this possibility of intimacy. Perhaps the affected person is worried about these changes but doesn’t dare talk about them. By naming things and adjusting the situation, one or the other of the partners who are experiencing these changes in sexual desires and habits can reduce the guilt of one or the other.
Are hospitals sexually frustrated?
In institutions, it can also be very relevant to think about this reality, think about the possibilities of arranging spaces and establish a philosophy of action and concrete practice in the face of this need that some clients will sometimes manifest. It may also be relevant, by analyzing practices and unethicalities, to see whether the philosophy or the means offered to the patients serve the maintenance of normal Sexuality or unintentionally encourage inappropriate sexual encounters both in the manner and in place. It is necessary to make the distinction, both for the beneficiaries of services and for the interveners, between long or short hospitalizations and between normal actions and desires and pathological ones. But it can be interesting not to relegate to the background the whole question of Sexuality, among other things, when explaining to the patient the side effects of his medication or the symptoms and impacts on his general functioning attributed to the disease he is suffering. It would seem, moreover, from the studies consulted, that professionals tend to omit this type of information.
As a parent, what can I do?
And as a parent, we must keep in mind that our children have come from somewhere and also live desires, aspirations and sexual needs through illness. Although affected, children grow up, age, and explore sensations and feelings that inhabit all human beings, but perhaps with one more taboo. It cannot be easy to live as a parent. It may be interesting to question ourselves about the place that these privacy needs will take in our home if we provide long-term accommodation for our child.
“Sexuality is one of the needs of every human being, whether or not he is sick. Unfortunately, even at the dawn of the 21st century, Sexuality is still surrounded by taboos and prohibitions in many societies worldwide. In my opinion, it is time to allow people with deficits to experience their Sexuality adequately and to support them in their choices. “
Open dialogue
The ideal is to open the dialogue when we can, that is quite certain. And this is desirable both for relatives who are confronted with desires or changes in sexual behavior and for people with the disease who see their sex life turned upside down by disease or medication. Open dialogue with its caregivers, doctors, and stakeholders. We do not all have the same degree of ease with this intimate and delicate subject. Still, seeing the affected person as a whole, we will remain open to this possibility of intimacy and fulfillment.
Suppose you are suffering from these issues and need help. Contact Kentucky Mental Health Care is a multidisciplinary therapy center with a team of experienced and devoted experts Therapist Louisville KY.
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